My dad showed this to me. And it is hilarious. Enjoy.
"DAYLIGHT EXACERBATES WARNING:
You may have noticed that March of this ear was particularly hot. As a matter of fact, I understand that it was the hottest March since the beginning of the last century. All of the trees were fully leafed out and legions of bugs and snakes were crawling around during a time in Arkansas when, on a normal year, we might see a snowflake or two.
This should come as no surprise to any reasonable person. As you know, Daylight Saving Time started almost a month early this year. You would think that members of Congress would have considered the warming effect that an extra hour of daylight would have on our climate. Or did they?
Perhaps this is another plot by a liberal congress to make us believe that global warming is a real threat. Perhaps next time there should be serious studies performed before congress passes laws with such far-reaching effects."
Oh dear. God bless America.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Aloha!
As some of you may know, I've spent the last five weeks in Oahu. My dad was on sabbatical and was conducting a research project on the rate of weathering on the island. I took advantage of the tropical setting, sunshine, and beaches in the backyard and had a blast. The days consisted of getting up when we felt like it, going on a hike, going to the beach and eating delicious Hawaiian food...can't complain about that!
At a macadamia nut plantation. Are you laughing at my nuts?
We ate so much pineapple that we may have actually become pineapples!
This is the drug tree, they're not barbecuing hot dogs under there!
A samoan chief making fire. Heck yeah.
My very cute Grammie.
Yeah that's me jumping off that rock. This is at Waimea beach on the north shore. It was one of my favorite beaches.
Before we went snorkeling at shark's cove, we also caught sight of some natural land wildlife. This man was showering in his skivvies, and he was not discreet about his business. The best part was that there was a group of 9 year olds witnessing the whole thing. Their teacher looked dumbfounded, like she didn't know whether to lead the kids elsewhere or teach them a life lesson.
My sister Alyssa and my dad being mad scientists.
There are gorgeous flowers EVERYWHERE!!
"How can this be???"
The backyard of our house...
At a macadamia nut plantation. Are you laughing at my nuts?
We ate so much pineapple that we may have actually become pineapples!
This is the drug tree, they're not barbecuing hot dogs under there!
A samoan chief making fire. Heck yeah.
My very cute Grammie.
Yeah that's me jumping off that rock. This is at Waimea beach on the north shore. It was one of my favorite beaches.
Before we went snorkeling at shark's cove, we also caught sight of some natural land wildlife. This man was showering in his skivvies, and he was not discreet about his business. The best part was that there was a group of 9 year olds witnessing the whole thing. Their teacher looked dumbfounded, like she didn't know whether to lead the kids elsewhere or teach them a life lesson.
My sister Alyssa and my dad being mad scientists.
There are gorgeous flowers EVERYWHERE!!
"How can this be???"
The backyard of our house...
and just beyond the backyard!! The beach!!
Girl's camp
Since I have been living at home, I had the wonderful opportunity to go to girl's camp this summer with the young women. I was called to be the assistant camp cook, which was quite the task. Lucky for me, I was only the assistant--less responsibility and more goof-off time for me! It was quite an experience to be there as a leader, and it made me appreciate all the hard work that goes in to making activities like this successful. The best part of the whole thing was being there with my little sista Melly. She is so fun, and I just love her! Here are a few pictures...none of me, but that's okay.
Melers, Jord, and Mariah livin' it up on the lake.
Mels rockin' at the stake activity...I'm not quite sure what they were doing, but I think it had something to do with multi-tasking, preparing for motherhood or something (gag!)
Melers, Jord, and Mariah livin' it up on the lake. 
Mels rockin' at the stake activity...I'm not quite sure what they were doing, but I think it had something to do with multi-tasking, preparing for motherhood or something (gag!)My trip to Arg
Um..If you know me at all, you know how obsessed and attached I am to Argentina. I love the people, the sky, the food (except cold-scrambled egg with maple syrup flan), the smells (yeah! the smells!), the sights, riding in the buses, and even the dust. So when Amber started talking about going back, I knew I couldn't miss out. In May, we made the long (and whiny) flight to Buenos Aires. Although the trip had its drawbacks, it really was the trip of a life time. And it definitely left me with ganas to go back again! I don't have all the pictures yet, but here are a few. I will blog more about the trip soon!!
This is the Bonventre family (a.k.a. the Crude family) from La Falda. They have five kids but only two were there. TEAR! In the mission, my companion and I taught all 7 of them, but had more success with their son Roberto and his friend Gustavo. Even if Ambi calls the the Crude family, I still love them with my whole heart and soul and have never been treated more kindly and more like family. We only saw them for a few minutes, but they shared with us a yummy lunch with the most delicious bread EVER! I need to go back and spend much more time with them.
These are the Nunez girls from Tandil. We went past their house to visit but they weren't home. On our way back, we found them in the street walking home! We had just enough time to snap a photo and squeal and cry at the sight of each other. As you can see from how bundled up we were-it was FREEZING cold there, so we let them continue on their way, again only getting to spend minutes with them :(
This is the Vallejos baby (can't remember the baby's name...oops). The baby came as a surprise to them, as their next oldest is already a teenager, but a family could not be more happy to have this little one in their home. I wanted to take him home with me though!
This is Melisa Wajchman, my 1st mission president's daughter. Probably the highlight of the trip was getting to spend a few days with this incredible family. Words can't even describe the spirit that emanates from their beings. I wish I could live with them forever!
This is the Bonventre family (a.k.a. the Crude family) from La Falda. They have five kids but only two were there. TEAR! In the mission, my companion and I taught all 7 of them, but had more success with their son Roberto and his friend Gustavo. Even if Ambi calls the the Crude family, I still love them with my whole heart and soul and have never been treated more kindly and more like family. We only saw them for a few minutes, but they shared with us a yummy lunch with the most delicious bread EVER! I need to go back and spend much more time with them.
These are the Nunez girls from Tandil. We went past their house to visit but they weren't home. On our way back, we found them in the street walking home! We had just enough time to snap a photo and squeal and cry at the sight of each other. As you can see from how bundled up we were-it was FREEZING cold there, so we let them continue on their way, again only getting to spend minutes with them :(
This is the Vallejos baby (can't remember the baby's name...oops). The baby came as a surprise to them, as their next oldest is already a teenager, but a family could not be more happy to have this little one in their home. I wanted to take him home with me though!
This is Melisa Wajchman, my 1st mission president's daughter. Probably the highlight of the trip was getting to spend a few days with this incredible family. Words can't even describe the spirit that emanates from their beings. I wish I could live with them forever!Tuesday, April 29, 2008
I can't sleep
I have to be to work at 6 AM. It is 1:14AM. That leaves me less than five hours....oh bother.
So as I am laying here trying to go to sleep, I realize that an old problem has reared its ugly head. It hasn't bothered me for quite a while, so it surprised me that I notice it again now. This is kind of a strange problem.
I have one hot foot and one cold one. When left exposed my left foot is hot and dry, and my right is cold and clammy. If I have socks on I don't notice the problem at all. This started happening in December 1999 when I back surgery for scoliosis. I guess the nerves just got all out of whack. Weird, right?
So as I am laying here trying to go to sleep, I realize that an old problem has reared its ugly head. It hasn't bothered me for quite a while, so it surprised me that I notice it again now. This is kind of a strange problem.
I have one hot foot and one cold one. When left exposed my left foot is hot and dry, and my right is cold and clammy. If I have socks on I don't notice the problem at all. This started happening in December 1999 when I back surgery for scoliosis. I guess the nerves just got all out of whack. Weird, right?
Monday, April 28, 2008
I was going through some stuff and found my first journal. I was reading through it and found some huh-larious stuff in here. It was surprising to me how much reading this helped me identify some underlying "issues" that I have. I was surprised to find that they started so long ago. Apparently, I've been nuts for a long time. It's not all sad nor is it all about my psychoticness-there is some pretty funny stuff in here. AnywayS, here goes.
June 16, 1991 (This is the first entry that I ever wrote.)
now I'm six I'm in first grad almost in second grad three more days of school on wensday we have a festival all the classes are going to do a dance all the classes exsept room 5 and six case were doing mousersise I'm going to be one of the leaders to do mousersise we have to praktise alot tita is always good she is going to be a good mouskuteer case she gose the same way that i go she is going to be a good leader I wish ther were 5 leaders she is very good at mousersise
December 31, 1994 (we had been on a family road trip to the Grand Canyon)
I'm not trying to be mean but Alyssa (6) is still a big baby in the car to and from, Alyssa had flem in her throaght because she had a cough. My mom and dad told her she needed to cough it up and spit it out, but she was afraid she'd throw up. Besides that I had a real good trip
August 1, 1996 (this is so bipolar I cannot even believe it)
Today has not been great first of all my mom told me to go vacume and weedwack the backyard then she told me to help Bryan with the Hilton's lawn. Then later that night she told me to help him do another lawn well she asked me to and then Bryan came in and asked if I was going to help him. Well I was thinking about it she just came out and said yes she wants to. It wasn't the doing the lawn that bugged me it was that she just decided for me. then later that night I found out that there's a really good chance that we'll be moving. What's wrong with here? I like it here. Plus well have new neighbors, a new ward, and a new school and I'll have to make new friends. I mean I love my friends and will really miss them a lot. It would be nice to be closer to grandma and grandpa's but I still like it here. I can't wait to be 12. I'll be out of primary and I'll start young womens. Also I'll be able to babysit. I'm fat, I'm really fat. So I'm trying to get into shape. Well i guess thats my day. See ya.
March 13, 1997 (I was talking about how hard the move was for me)
(People who read this: DON'T YOU DARE read this until I am DEAD!!!!! Also for all I know you could be reading this in a room full of 20 year old HOT guys) Oh well. wow there's so much to write about. Why couldn't my dad get a job at UNLV? I would be so much happier there. I have a huge room but can't think of it as home. There are these twins Aaron and Chris who are Bryan's friends and Aaron is so cute. I don't know why but Chris is ugly (sorry if he's reading this) and they're identical twins! Go figure. This Saturday I'm going to see Marvins Room because Leonardo DiCaprio is in it. HE is my soulmate even though he's 22 and I'm 12. So maybe he isn't I can still dream, can't I?
June 14, 1997 (1997 was a hard and funny and well documented year for me)
Ya know what's freaky yesterday was Fri. the 13th. Also a black cat crossed my path yesterday. Then today I got a headache. Friday and today Bryan and I were at grandma and grandpa's house cleaning. It wasn't that fun but we each made 35 $.
July 23, 1997
Today we went to a rodeo, it was awful! They were taking these baby steers roping them around the neck. Then the cowboy got off his horse and threw the cow down on his side. I was mad! We all eat hamburger but this is more than just hamburger and steak. This is totally abusing them, and what did they ever do to us? I'm now a vegetarian.
September 5, 1997
It's Friday YIPEE! Well, tomorrow Bryan daddy and Dave Tedder are going to a football game. A BYU home game. I wand to go but I told mom I'd babysit for 5$ an hour. But also part of me wants the money. I'll probably end up babysitting. Either way I'll still wand to do the other thing.
Okay I could go on...so much funny stuff in here...on a later post I'll do some from my more recent journals.
June 16, 1991 (This is the first entry that I ever wrote.)
now I'm six I'm in first grad almost in second grad three more days of school on wensday we have a festival all the classes are going to do a dance all the classes exsept room 5 and six case were doing mousersise I'm going to be one of the leaders to do mousersise we have to praktise alot tita is always good she is going to be a good mouskuteer case she gose the same way that i go she is going to be a good leader I wish ther were 5 leaders she is very good at mousersise
December 31, 1994 (we had been on a family road trip to the Grand Canyon)
I'm not trying to be mean but Alyssa (6) is still a big baby in the car to and from, Alyssa had flem in her throaght because she had a cough. My mom and dad told her she needed to cough it up and spit it out, but she was afraid she'd throw up. Besides that I had a real good trip
August 1, 1996 (this is so bipolar I cannot even believe it)
Today has not been great first of all my mom told me to go vacume and weedwack the backyard then she told me to help Bryan with the Hilton's lawn. Then later that night she told me to help him do another lawn well she asked me to and then Bryan came in and asked if I was going to help him. Well I was thinking about it she just came out and said yes she wants to. It wasn't the doing the lawn that bugged me it was that she just decided for me. then later that night I found out that there's a really good chance that we'll be moving. What's wrong with here? I like it here. Plus well have new neighbors, a new ward, and a new school and I'll have to make new friends. I mean I love my friends and will really miss them a lot. It would be nice to be closer to grandma and grandpa's but I still like it here. I can't wait to be 12. I'll be out of primary and I'll start young womens. Also I'll be able to babysit. I'm fat, I'm really fat. So I'm trying to get into shape. Well i guess thats my day. See ya.
March 13, 1997 (I was talking about how hard the move was for me)
(People who read this: DON'T YOU DARE read this until I am DEAD!!!!! Also for all I know you could be reading this in a room full of 20 year old HOT guys) Oh well. wow there's so much to write about. Why couldn't my dad get a job at UNLV? I would be so much happier there. I have a huge room but can't think of it as home. There are these twins Aaron and Chris who are Bryan's friends and Aaron is so cute. I don't know why but Chris is ugly (sorry if he's reading this) and they're identical twins! Go figure. This Saturday I'm going to see Marvins Room because Leonardo DiCaprio is in it. HE is my soulmate even though he's 22 and I'm 12. So maybe he isn't I can still dream, can't I?
June 14, 1997 (1997 was a hard and funny and well documented year for me)
Ya know what's freaky yesterday was Fri. the 13th. Also a black cat crossed my path yesterday. Then today I got a headache. Friday and today Bryan and I were at grandma and grandpa's house cleaning. It wasn't that fun but we each made 35 $.
July 23, 1997
Today we went to a rodeo, it was awful! They were taking these baby steers roping them around the neck. Then the cowboy got off his horse and threw the cow down on his side. I was mad! We all eat hamburger but this is more than just hamburger and steak. This is totally abusing them, and what did they ever do to us? I'm now a vegetarian.
September 5, 1997
It's Friday YIPEE! Well, tomorrow Bryan daddy and Dave Tedder are going to a football game. A BYU home game. I wand to go but I told mom I'd babysit for 5$ an hour. But also part of me wants the money. I'll probably end up babysitting. Either way I'll still wand to do the other thing.
Okay I could go on...so much funny stuff in here...on a later post I'll do some from my more recent journals.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
April Fool's day
So I work with this doctor who thinks he is great. And in fact, he is very ungreat. He bothers me, and pretty much everyone who works with him. He is the type who gives his loooong opinions no matter if they have been sought for or not, the type who thinks he is hysterical. But, he is in fact the board certified deliverer of babies, so I guess we tolerate him as it would be highly illegal for any of us to do it without him. I hate it when you need people you can't stand. grr. Today, in all of his self-perceived funniness, he decided to play some april fool's joke on the nursing staff at the hospital.
Joke number one: He told our floor manager that he had been discussing with one of the most notoriously bad OBs in the area, and that this bad doctor had expressed desires to practice with him and start bringing his patients to our hospital. As the horror filled this poor lady's face at the thought of having to deal with such a horrible doc he burst into laughter. All of us who were around just stared in unbelief.
Joke number two: Later in the day he called from his clinic and talked frantically about a pregnant patient of his who was due with triplets in 6 weeks who had gone into labor that he was going to send over. Now, the nurse who answered was probably the only one who would have bought this...because please....he does NOT make his own phone calls. Some poor girl making minimum wage does his dirty work. The nurse hung up and started frantically gathering up staff and equipment to prepare for this intense situation. Then about five minutes later we all convinced her to call back and ask him if it was a joke. He laughed even more hysterically that she had taken him seriously. What a butthead.
on NPR (I know, I'm a nerd) they were doing a cast about april fool's jokes people had done. They had an April Fool's day "expert" on to give us tips on great pranks to play. I only heard a smidgin of what he said....
Put post-it notes on the bottom of the laser mouses at work... then sit back and watch everyone get frustrated at technology....then duck as they toss staplers at you when they realize what you've done.
What good April Fool's day jokes have you seen? I need good ideas for next year!!
Joke number one: He told our floor manager that he had been discussing with one of the most notoriously bad OBs in the area, and that this bad doctor had expressed desires to practice with him and start bringing his patients to our hospital. As the horror filled this poor lady's face at the thought of having to deal with such a horrible doc he burst into laughter. All of us who were around just stared in unbelief.
Joke number two: Later in the day he called from his clinic and talked frantically about a pregnant patient of his who was due with triplets in 6 weeks who had gone into labor that he was going to send over. Now, the nurse who answered was probably the only one who would have bought this...because please....he does NOT make his own phone calls. Some poor girl making minimum wage does his dirty work. The nurse hung up and started frantically gathering up staff and equipment to prepare for this intense situation. Then about five minutes later we all convinced her to call back and ask him if it was a joke. He laughed even more hysterically that she had taken him seriously. What a butthead.
on NPR (I know, I'm a nerd) they were doing a cast about april fool's jokes people had done. They had an April Fool's day "expert" on to give us tips on great pranks to play. I only heard a smidgin of what he said....
Put post-it notes on the bottom of the laser mouses at work... then sit back and watch everyone get frustrated at technology....then duck as they toss staplers at you when they realize what you've done.
What good April Fool's day jokes have you seen? I need good ideas for next year!!
My mosquito story
When I was in third grade I wrote a short story that has been crossing my mind as of late. So I decided to dig it out.... Hope you likeeee. Here it is, unedited, in all its third grade glory.
The Mosquito that Buzzes in Peoples' Ears
by a third grade Laura Nelson
One night I was fast asleep in my bed when a mosquito buzzed past my ear. I thought it was airplane flying through my bedroom! I went downstairs. I got a drink of water and went to the bathroom then I went back to bed. I fell asleep. The mosquito buzzed by my ear, again it was so loud I thought it was an airplane. I woke up again. I went to my mom's room I layed beside her. The mosquito buzzed by her ear. She thought it was an airplane going past her ear! Soon, the mosquito buzzed past everyone's ears. We were all awake. Then we decided to go for a drive and get ice cream cones. We didn't know it, but guess what? The mosquito got in the car too! The mosquito buzzed past my dad's ear (while he was driving) and he thought it was an airplane fly by the car. He got scared, and we got in an accident. Ice cream got all over the car but everyone was okay except the mosquito. He got smushed in one of the cookies in my cookies 'n cream ice cream cone.
What makes this story even better are the comments given by my teacher. She said "Great use of sequence and humor. I enjoyed your story-very imaginative." Do you think she was referring to the fact that I told this story as a play by play--I got a drink. I fell back asleep. I ended this blog...
The Mosquito that Buzzes in Peoples' Ears
by a third grade Laura Nelson
One night I was fast asleep in my bed when a mosquito buzzed past my ear. I thought it was airplane flying through my bedroom! I went downstairs. I got a drink of water and went to the bathroom then I went back to bed. I fell asleep. The mosquito buzzed by my ear, again it was so loud I thought it was an airplane. I woke up again. I went to my mom's room I layed beside her. The mosquito buzzed by her ear. She thought it was an airplane going past her ear! Soon, the mosquito buzzed past everyone's ears. We were all awake. Then we decided to go for a drive and get ice cream cones. We didn't know it, but guess what? The mosquito got in the car too! The mosquito buzzed past my dad's ear (while he was driving) and he thought it was an airplane fly by the car. He got scared, and we got in an accident. Ice cream got all over the car but everyone was okay except the mosquito. He got smushed in one of the cookies in my cookies 'n cream ice cream cone.
What makes this story even better are the comments given by my teacher. She said "Great use of sequence and humor. I enjoyed your story-very imaginative." Do you think she was referring to the fact that I told this story as a play by play--I got a drink. I fell back asleep. I ended this blog...
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